Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
