RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just google imaged poop.
Welp...herpes.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
