You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
