You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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