you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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