Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize