Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize