I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
