My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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