I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
