remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize