Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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