I want to stick my p in your. b.
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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