I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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