all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
