What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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