I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
