I bet he comes in French.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Houston, we have a blender
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
