We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize