I showed him my bush... on skype.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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