Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
