and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
