If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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