I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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