Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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