There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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