Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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