No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
