just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
