Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
