Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
How does one acquire holy water?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
