they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
