$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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