Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
