you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You've changed since you got that strap on
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize