I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
