if i died would you start the facebook group?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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