Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
