Dual....:-)
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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