Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize