I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Randomize