508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
