so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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