he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
