Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize