My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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