never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
