Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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