did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
