your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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