About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
